As I am writing this down, I see her. And this isn't dotdotdot anymore. Its A. Ohh, A. Where do I begin?
When I lost dotdotdot. I thought woah, im sad, I dont think I can recover. Blahblahblah Macam the world doesnt spin anymore and whatever. I was kind of foolish to think those sort of things even though it felt right and it felt true. I did tore up in pieces and yes it made me feel like utter shit. But my atuk always told me, which all who are reading should believe, that everything happens for a reason.
To whoever who was left without consent, who were shattered by lies of false words. Please, don't make it hard for urselves. Keep ur shit together. But how could you when that other half made you so fucked up. I understand. When I was going thru the same shit, Lots of words of encouragement flung my way. Quotes by people who have :-
Adrees : Its okay man, Being single is fun! You could go out with whoever you want, Mingle as as much as you'd like. Get a few scandals here and there. Play the field.
Su : Adruce, move on. I hate seeing my little brother like this. Yes, you can wait. Tapi
sampai bila? Lots of other girls can make you happy.
Nab : Adruce, you should get someone you're age.
Oh yeah, did i forget to mention my other half asked me to wait? Yeah, that's right. Its been two months and I haven't heard even a hi. Cruel kan? But some people tend to screw you up and hold you down. Listen, I have grown tired of hearing her flurring about elsewhere with other men while I sit waiting for a phone call or an sms. Listen guys, Things may seem bad at first. You can't find a reason to get up from bed, you wouldn't even turn on ur ipod just in case her songs come playing, But why do we end up doing the things we did. Its because we keep remembering the good stuff. Sure there were plenty. Not forgetting the bad ones. Look again, Im sure you'l see something different. We will always keep thinking about them. The way they made us laugh. The way they made us happy. Sure, but was it true for them as it was for us? Ask urself that question.
My main advice, don't shun urselves from doing what you love and normally do. NEVER EVER pass up an oppurtunity to socialize or meet new people like say in my case, Sofia's Halloween Party. Here's where i met A. I swear the moment i saw her. Wasnt like any other. I cudn't keep my eyes off of her. Even Aizat noticed that I had my eye on her the whole night. We met in a unordinary fashion. I was basicly making jokes and dancing thriller that night. She noticed and laughed alot. One thing led to another and we started talking. She invited me and our friends to go swimming in her pool. I had a blast. I couldn't remember the last time i had so much fun. We played a bunch of games. And she on the other hand, made a move by saying " You look like David Archuleta. Pastu, dia sengih. HAHA. It was so cute. and basicly the night went perfect. Around 3am, me, ameerul and aizat decided to hit the culdesac. About Halfway thru my journey. I couldnt help but think, " Am I walking away empty handed? No numbers, no emails" of course I did, I didn't want to rush things. But then, Aizat gave me an epiphany to give it a shot. Went back all the way. Rang her doorbell. She was at her window, staring down at me. As she opened her window, she said, Are you missing something? And i said, Yeah, Youre number! She and her friends laughed, and she went on ahead by giving me her number while tersengih-sengih. And i bid her goodnight. Since then, I have seen her a cpl of times. Texting her and calling her everyday. Im starting to feel like the hole in my heart never existed. A managed to sow it back up. And when i keep thinking about it, Have i moved on? Have i finally gotten over dotdotdot? I think so. That being said, A is more of a sweetheart than i hoped she would be. She's FUNNY! haha. Makes me laugh, we have the same taste in movies. Tho not so much in music. But il force her to listen to my ipod anyways. Haha. Im liking her more and more each day.
It feels good. THIS feels good. Im finally happy. :)
